After taking note from Alan's feedback we wanted to fix the storyboard as fast as possible, so this is my attempt at two of the problems raised.
Second problem was the science and human reaction part of the trailer. What I wanted to do is put as much explanation in as we possibly could because I think the audience will need it. The scene takes place in a science lab with the scientist trying to explain what is going on as the main actor and actress listen to him. I have come up with a draft dialogue for the actors involved.
Scientist - "This is a fascinating creature, originally this specie will only grow to 20cm but this beast has grown to 100 feet long! The head is 10 feet alone.
Scientist - "The only explanation is this creature has come into contact with nuclear waste and it's DNA changed in such a way that it was able to grow to such a terrifying size.
Main Actor - "How do we destroy it?"
Scientist - "Well that's the thing, the weakness of the normal centipede is heat and drought..."
Main Actor - "So all we have to do is burn it!"
Scientist - "Unfortunately no. You see I have analysed the Data and the creatures DNA has been altered so much that it doesn't have any more weaknesses. No weapon that the human race possesses will destroy this Centipede"
I already find this improvement of the scene to be much more interesting and something to pay attention to in trailer. It also opens up a lot of challenges for us in production when it comes to the lip syncing and animating the characters.
The amendments seem to answer Alan's questions on those specific scenes, but still think finding the money shot would would allow us to back track the rest on the rest of the storyboard. Plus, as mentioned in the meeting should we include the weapon to defeat the monster?
ReplyDeleteUnintended benefit - DNA was proved to be responsible for inheritance in the early 1950s, so I like the idea of chucking it in as a piece of techno-babble. However, since this is a B Movie, I think we really want the described mechanism to be obviously wrong (since the writer would certainly not be bothered with scientific accuracy).
ReplyDeleteMight I suggest something along the lines of
"Atomic waste has been incorporated into the Centipede's DNA, energising it at the cellular level and leading to this unnatural growth"
and
"My readings indicate that the Centipede is absorbing the power of the military's attacks, leading to an increase in the rate of growth. If my calculations are correct, within 2 days it will be bigger than the island of Manhattan!"
I think this will help with the money shot, since we could get away with a really big Centipede.
I don't like the dialogue about "no weapon of the human race can harm it" - I think it's not psuedoscientific enough. Perhaps some more convoluted thing.
"We cannot burn it, but we must indeed fight fire with fire! Luckily, I have been working of an anti-atomic ray to neutralise the atomic explosives of our enemies, which I believe is the answer to our problem..."
Incidentally, I think we need to take care to use the term "atomic" rather than "nuclear" - it's more 1950s (and sounds slightly odd, which I think adds to the "period£ feel)
Thanks for the feedback guys, I defintely agree with the language Dan and you've put what i've put just more 1950's..... so awesome!
ReplyDeleteI don't think mentioning the actual idea of the weapon is what we need, I think we just needt keep it at all other weapons are not working. I like the idea of the beast absorbing the power from the impacts.
Mentioning the weapon may not be what's needed, but I think we do need a shot of it - in the background of the lab perhaps? It'll also give us a chance to design a crazy 50s death ray (which should be fun)
ReplyDeleteIndeed that could be cool!
ReplyDelete